35/35

35 weeks pregnant/35 days until Eloise's due date!! I can't believe I am only 35 days away from December 6th! This pregnancy really flew! She has been kicking me a lot lately, and I am still having the occasional heartburn. I don't want to complain a lot but there is so much my body is doing that I can't even begin to explain how excited I am to get my body back. I love knowing that she is inside of me, but at the same time I am ready to hold her in my arms, not my belly! We have officially completed our childbirth classes. They did a good job in preparing us for everything. But, it also made me realize how much I do NOT want a C-Section. As long as Eloise is healthy, I'll take it. I can't wait to meet our little girl :). This weekend is my baby shower and I am very excited! I am so blessed to have so many people want to come and celebrate Eloise June and buy her things! This girl is already so spoiled and she isn't even here yet. It is super special to know how many people are almost as excited as Julian and I are about her arrival!

32 weeks pregnant!

I can't believe I am already 32 weeks pregnant!! Eloise is moving all over the place and I absolutely love to feel it. I sometimes can't imagine not being pregnant. I have a little over 50 days until her due date and I can't wait to find out how she is going to make her way into this world! We have a lot of things going on in the few short weeks until her birth.

Eloise and I have had many discussions about when she is going to arrive. I have told her I will be happy with whenever she is ready. But, if she really wanted to make mommy happy she would come the week after Thanksgiving but before her due date! That would be mommy's ideal time :) But, I make plans and God laughs....

30 weeks pregnant!!

What a wonderful time of year! October starts at the end of this week & I am 30 weeks pregnant. My favorite candle scent is back in stores and fall is FINALLY starting to arrive!

--Julian has spent the last couple of days in California. His dad had a business trip there with a free beach house. So, Julian and Jordan went down from Thurs-Mon and joined him for a little mini vacation! Julian will be home tomorrow night and I cannot wait to see him! I have missed him so much. I always get nervous when planes are involved, but I pray for his safe arrival home and I know that when he gets here I can take a big sigh of relief.

--I have gained a total of 23 lbs so far. A little more than what I wanted for this stage of my pregnancy but definitely in the range of what is acceptable. I feel like it is all belly which is a good thing. I am hoping I can lose most of that by just giving birth and breastfeeding. Then, by March I am going to start P90x and get back to my ideal weight (115lbs). Even though pregnancy has really agreed with me and it has been really easy so far, it is still hard to give up your body. It is so neat to watch everything change and grow and know that my little girl is growing inside of me. But, at the same time, I don't feel like it is my body. I probably won't feel like it is my body again for a while. I know that it is all worth it though :)

--Julian isn't currently working. All the housing jobs are done pretty much and he has calls to answer every now and then but mostly he has been a stay at home dad the last week or so. We are banking on the fact that we should be getting a profit check soon (hopefully)!! So, I keep praying for the profit check to hurry up and make its way into our hands and for Highview Homes to find a new job fast. If we didn't get the profit check this month it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world because we could live off of savings. But, not for much longer than a month. Julian also starts his real estate class soon, so that will at least keep him busy! But, with Christmas creeping up, I don't want to have to start to worry about money. I like living comfortably.

--We are currently trying to find a church. After the whole debacle with Bayside Chapel (that will be a whole other post when I have to time and energy for it), we haven't really been actively attending church. But, I really want to find one we like before Eloise comes. I think having your children get in the habit of going to church is a good thing. Let's hope we can find something that works for us.

--Kelly and Jeff moved to NJ on Labor Day. It has been really fun having a whole new set of faces to see when we all go out. I am excited to see how our whole dynamic of friendship changes and becomes better. It is also nice to see what life is like with a child. Blake is a really good baby. It is nice that there are going to be babies around for Eloise to be friends with.

--Work is going really well. I LOVE my new students and their parents seem really awesome. I do feel bad that I am leaving so soon (Nov. 19th is my last day) but at least it will leave a good taste in my mouth and I'll be ready to go back in September.

--my baby shower is quickly approaching and I can't wait!! Actually, I really can't wait until Eloise is here. When I think about the actual delivery party, I get anxious. So, I decided from now on I am not thinking about it. The day will come when Eloise has to come out of me. I will do what has to be done, no need worrying about it! The baby shower is going to be so nice! Julian's mom and sister are coming and I am just so excited to celebrate and get the rest of the stuff we need for our little girl.

28 weeks pregnant!

I am officially in my third trimester and I am still feeling pretty good! School has started again, and it is a welcome change from summer. I am excited for fall weather so I can stop sweating all of the time. I still don't have many pregnancy related issues. Lately, though, my sciatica has been bothering me at night. I think it has to do with going back to work, not wearing the correct shoes, and standing most of the day. I plan on wearing more comfortable shoes this week. So, we'll see if that helps the sciatica pain.

As far as the nursery goes, we have walls done and painted, the stroller is up and ready for Eloise, and the glider from pottery barn is all set up. The crib and furniture hasn't been delivered yet, so we are still waiting on that. I go in her room all the time and just sit in the chair and stare. I can.not.wait to rock her!!

I can't believe things are being planned for after her birth. I have Christmas parties to go to, birthday parties, and just events in general. I am nervous about what it is going to be like with her around. Am I going to want to bring her and leave early? Am I going to want to leave her? Am I going to want to bring her for a bit, then have Julian come get her and I stay or vice versa? Or will it be fine keeping her the whole time? I guess once she comes I'll have a better idea of my limitations and what I feel comfortable with.

My last day of school is November 19th, and then I take the rest of the year off. It is exciting to know I will have that time with her, and not have to worry about work! I feel very blessed to be able to do that.

Here is a list of what is most important to me about the delivery and afterwards:

1. Breastfeeding: I really want to breastfeed for at least 6 months exclusively. I want to not even pump for the first month or two. After that I will look into pumping, but this is the number one most important thing on my list. I will do whatever it takes to continue breastfeeding for as long as possible.

2. Vaginal Delivery: I do NOT want a C-section. But, I guess a lot of other people had them, and they didn't want them either. I have heard NJ is the number 1 state for C-sections and I would really like to avoid it at all costs if I can. I mean if the baby is under stress and it is an ABSOLUTE emergency, then of course I would be fine with it. But, I will labor for hours rather than have a C-section.

3. No Artificial Rupturing: I want my water to break on its own. I feel that is what is supposed to happen and what is most natural. Plus, I have read if your water has to be broken, then you have a better chance of having a C-section.

But, how many times have women made plans for their birth and it went exactly as planned? Probably not many. I just have to know that the doctors are going to do everything they can so that Eloise and I are healthy and that is the most important thing!

25 weeks pregnant and Attachment Parenting

25 weeks and feeling great! I feel so blessed to not have any real pregnancy pains that most women do. I never really had morning sickness, I was tired in my first trimester but not overly so where I would fall asleep in the afternoon. I have a little back pain but nothing terrible. I really haven't had any pregnancy headaches or stuffiness. I do have a little pregnancy mask on my face but that really is my only 'symptom'. I started this whole journey at 116lbs, and now I am 120lbs. So I have gained a total of 4 lbs so far (well that was at my 24 week appointment). If I stay on this schedule, I will gain a total of about 30 pounds which I will be totally happy with!

School is starting in about a week and I am trying to get as much done for Eloise that I can before I have to go back. We have registered at Pottery Barn Kids, Buy Buy Baby, and Target. We have signed up for three classes at the hospital: breastfeeding, infant care, and childbirth preparation. We have sent in our pre-registration forms to the hospital. We have painted Eloise's room and are waiting for the furniture to arrive (it should be any day now!). We have filled out my maternity leave paperwork and handed it in--my last day of work is November 19th. Now, I am looking into different parenting styles and I have come to really love the idea of AP or attachment parenting.

Attachment Parenting has a couple components. Breastfeeding, baby wearing, bed sharing, sleeping and scheduling.

Breastfeeding: I plan on breastfeeding on demand. I will nurse as long or as short as Eloise will want. She will know when she is hungry, and as long as I follow her cues to a certain extent then things should go pretty smoothly. I also plan on breastfeeding exclusively for 6 months. After that, Eloise will start solids and maybe some formula and only nurse once in a while. We will see how this plan goes. I will update you once I am actually breastfeeding.

Baby Wearing: I have registered for the moby wrap and a hotsling. Being able to wear her should make things easier on everyone. I can do everything I need to do in a day and Eloise will be close by at least for the first month or so. Then, we can look into trying to nap in other places besides on me or in my arms.

Bed Sharing: Now, bed sharing is something we are NOT going to do but I am not against it. We are going to room share which has a lot of positives as well. With Julian's crazy dreams/sleep habits I wouldn't want our baby in the bed with us. But she will be right next to us in a bassinet. That way in the middle of the night, if she wants to nurse I can lay her down with me and nurse in a side lying position and go back to sleep for a while.

Sleep Habits: We don't plan on doing any sleep training as of right now. I feel that babies cry for a reason, and as their mother you should respond to these cries immediately. Most babies aren't going to be sleeping through the night, especially if they are breastfed.

Scheduling: I think scheduling is important but I don't want to overdue it. I don't want to force Eloise to take 3 scheduled naps a day if she isn't tired, or if she is tired. I plan on following babies cues. If she wants to take three naps...great. If she wants to take 4 or 5 naps...great. As long as she is healthy I think that getting on a schedule isn't important. As far as bedtime goes, I think there should be a schedule. My plan of a routine is starting at 7:30 with bath, lotion, nursing, book, swaddle, sleep. But other than that I feel like going with the flow and responding to what babies needs are at that moment are most important. Of course, as babies get older they do need a more structured schedule. So I will let you know how that goes :)

21 weeks pregnant

Eloise's bedding from Pottery Barn Kids:

Barcelo Los Cabos
19 weeks pregnant!

So much has happened in the past 5 weeks! Julian and I went on our babymoon to Cabo, Mexico. It was amazing!! We stayed at this really nice resort---Barcelo Los Cabos--and had such a relaxing time. Then, a couple days after we had gotten home we had our anatomy scan. Both Julian and I were really excited to find out if baby Barker was a boy or a girl. We were both strongly leaning towards boy. I had a boy nursery picked out, I had boy ideas picked out. But, you make plans and God laughs so guess what?? We are having a sweet baby girl!!! I couldn't be more excited!!! I think it took Julian a while to get used to the idea of having a girl but now he is just excited as I am. He was thinking rough and tough ball playing/wrestling. Now he is thinking how to protect his little girl from all things boy. My entire family is soo soo excited. My mom wants to know when she can reserve Cinderella's castle because there is a two year waiting list. Eloise June Barker is going to be one spoiled little girl! Ellie, as we have been calling her, is named after Eloise at the Plaza and her middle name is my grandmother's name.

Even though we have bought all this girl bedding and clothes I am still nervous that the tech was wrong and it could still be a boy. You hear of that happening to people all the time. So, next week I am going for an elective ultrasound to double check the sex. Hopefully, it is still a little girl because I have seriously bonded with her. I can't wait to see what she looks like and hold her in my arms. only 19 more weeks to go!!

We also figured out maternity leave which was very confusing. I am going back to work in September obviously. But, then I am only working until November 19th. I'll take two weeks of my sick days and that takes us to December 13th. Then we get the Family Leave Act for 84 days including weekends and holidays and that brings us to March 17th. Then from March 17th until the next year I will be unpaid and we won't have insurance. Cobra is about $2,000/month which is ridiculous so I think we'll be trying to get a blue cross/blue shield insurance for those couple of months I am not working. Then, I am pretty sure, I'll go back to work the next September. I always thought I would be a SAHM from the beginning. But, we are young, I have a very amazing job for a mom, and my mom is willing to babysit everyday if need be. SO, why not make as much money as possible now? If I do go back to work though, we'll be getting pregnant again much sooner than expected so I can take off another couple months for maternity leave.

16 weeks pregnant!

I can't believe I haven't posted anything in such a long time! I guess life got in the way and I put the blog on the back burner. Well to start off, Julian and I have done quite a few things in the past couple of weeks. We went to Tampa with Mike and Shannon, we registered for baby items, and we went to a wedding in Connecticut. I finished with school for the year and I am not working this summer so that is very exciting for me. Also, Julian and I leave for Cabo in a week. It's crazy how fast time flies, the baby is going to be here before we know it!

Anyway, on to the pregnancy... 16 weeks and I am feeling pretty great. I recently had the stomach flu (yuck!) and was out of commission for about two days. I couldn't believe I hadn't thrown up once this whole pregnancy and then I get the stomach flu-in summer-and my luck changes. I was really worried about what the lack of calories I was getting for baby, but we had a doctors appointment and she said that baby was moving a lot and the heartbeat was strong. But, she was a little concerned about my weight. Here is the deal with that...

Before I was pregnant I probably weighed anywhere from 112-114lbs. Once we found out I was pregnant and went to the doctor, I guess I was 6 weeks by then and I weighed 116. I don't know if I was bloated or had just gained a couple lbs just because I hadn't been exercising, etc. Anyway, then at the end of my first trimester they weighed me in at 118. Then, I this appointment I was back at 116. But, I had just gotten over the stomach flu as well.

I guess we'll see if I can gain some more weight before my next appointment. If anything it's an extra excuse to get some milkshakes and fries whenever I get the urge!!

The doctor also said I should be able to feel the baby move soon. It's called 'quickening' and it feels like gas and/or bubbles popping. I am excited for that feeling. I thought I felt it a couple of times but I am not sure that it definitely wasn't gas. I am excited for all the fun stuff still to come with this pregnancy!